#Havingawordwimesen isn’t​ just about dwelling on the past, it’s​ about re-writing it

Our brain is more powerful than we give it credit for and what we think consciously and unconsciously can have an impact on how we see ourselves, how we personal and how we feel about ourselves. I came across this quote recently and it got me thinking about my own limiting beliefs

Limiting behaviors originate from limiting beliefs. Our beliefs form the basis of our experiences and how we perceive ourselves and the world around us. When our beliefs are limited, we limit our perception and experience of what is possible. It doesn’t matter if those beliefs are false. As long as we believe them, they will accordingly impact and mold our perception of experience. The more limiting our beliefs, the less powerful we feel.”  Edward Morler.

I have tonnes of them, some I have overcome others, pop up from time to time, I tend to notice these more when I am putting things off or avoiding something.  I recently private messages people I knew from my linkedIn if they would be willing to provide me with a recommendation for my profile. I had been putting this off for ages, thinking it was a little narcissistic and a little self indulgent, plus I sometimes feel uncomfortable with positive feedback, but I know that this is only down to my limiting beliefs. People often say I reflect too much, I think they think I am living in the past, butting actual fact what I am doing is rewriting the limiting beliefs from my past to make me a better person, someone who cares not just about others, but also myself.

For example one of my limiting beliefs is “I’m not good enough” now this is a BIGGY for me and it’s one of those limiting beliefs that pops up more often than I care to admit.

After tentatively private messaging a few people I knew I took a leap of faith and asked if they would be willing to write something on my profile, I was touched with the responses, here are a few… 

Tracey, to use the jargon, is a completer/finisher with lots of ambition to make the world a better place. Every task she takes on, she does so with the determination and enthusiasm to make it the best of its kind. In the background is her experience of having been substance dependent, a carer for of people who were substance dependent and all the emotional and life struggles it involves. If skill, experience and hard work isn’t enough, Tracy also cares deeply for those caught up, in one way or another, in substance misuse.

Tracey is passionate, dedicated and believes the best in others even when the going gets tough. She’s also a champion for recovery, and having worked within the drug and alcohol misuse field for many years, Tracey remains a consistent advocate for inclusive and user-led service development.

Airnt they lovely and guess what? Because these have come from people I know well, because I trust them, I am more inclined to believe and learnt to accept what they see in me, they will help remind me and serve me well whenever old limiting beliefs rise to the surface, I have something to replace that shit negative limiting belief.

There are a lot of people who don’t even realise that it is their own limiting beliefs that are holding them back. They will blame those around them, or blame their circumstances, when in fact it’s probably got more to do with what they are thinking, which will then determine have they behave and react to situations. 

Over the years I have started to take on more risks and trying new things, but it hasn’t been easy for every new risk comes the self-doubt, the self-questioning “am I good enough? What if it goes wrong? I mean I have made mistakes in the past right? I’ve fucked up before? “

Our limiting beliefs are generalisations that we accept as truth without any positive proof or knowledge. Limiting beliefs can suffocate our personal potential, that’s why if I find myself struggling or procrastinating I will search for a limiting belief, and guest what?  I always find one or two that’s why #Havingawordwimesen helps me to figure out which one is trying to raise its ugly head…

  • I’m not good at this.
  • Others can do it better than me.
  • I’m not experienced enough.
  • I’m not smart enough.
  • I’m not important enough.
  • I’m too old.
  • I don’t have the time.
  • It’s too hard.
  • I don’t deserve success.
  • This is just “the way it is.”
  • I have no control over this.

Some of our beliefs have been groomed and nurtured from childhood into adulthood and can hold us back, but if we are aware of them, then at least we can do something about them, but this takes time and practice and the practice is worth it because our limiting beliefs can 

  • trick you into not trying.
  • stops you from taking risks.
  • keeps you where you are.
  • obstructs your growth.
  • keeps you repeating negative patterns.
  • prevents you from taking responsibility for your life.
  • prevents you from going after your dreams.
  • encourages procrastination.
  • gives you an excuse for not doing what you really want to do.
  • fills you with doubt and fear.
  • prompts you to find “evidence” to support it.
  • stops you from imagining the possibilities.
  • makes you feel negative and discontent.
  • prevents breakthroughs.

If you are doubting yourself or feeling down, ask yourself, what limiting beliefs are holding you back?

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